"Your [left|right] is your one and only exit."
Earlier in the week I was looking at the weather maps and it didn't look good. More !$%&ing rain. It's been raining steadily for three months now...essentially, it's been raining ever since it stopped snowing. And it's been cold. Are we ever going to get "summer" this year? Is it any wonder that I have been grumpier than usual this season?
Anyway, the weather report suggested something interesting...that I could escape the rain if I went to Western Michigan. I seriously considered making a surprise appearance at TimbersFest, then opted out when I didn't get up early on Saturday. That left Sunday. Deciding I wanted to do something different, I grabbed my Wyandot Lake pass (which I STILL haven't used at Wyandot Lake), jumped into the car, and started North on IR-71.
IR-71 North of Columbus may be the most useless highway in the State of Ohio. No, "useless" isn't quite the right term. But it does go to Cleveland, the Mistake on the Lake, that little town surrounded by countless little villages that exist mostly to turn Northeast Ohio into one gigantic speed trap. All the major highways run parallel, and none of them is 65 MPH. IR-71 itself is heavily congested, filled with trucks going 60 MPH and rude nutcases doing 90. It will help once it is 3 lanes each way all the way, but that project will take years to complete. For now there are three non-contiguous construction zones, non-contiguous with the areas already expanded to three lanes. At least in Ohio they keep two lanes open during construction...
Anyway, after a long drawn out journey through one of my least favorite parts of the state, I reached the park. I noticed that the entrance has been changed yet again. Southbound traffic now enters at a new traffic signal shared with the shopping center across the street. Funny how that works. The park has been there for 115 years and has never had a traffic light to aid traffic entering and exiting the parking lot, even though it has desperately needed one for decades. A little strip shopping center opens up across the street and a traffic signal is installed before the center is even complete. Anyway, I paid my $8 (do I get a wax job with that?) and parked in the outer reaches of the parking lot. I strapped on the camera bag and hiked to the entrance, where my Wyandot Lake pass scanned easily. I handed my camera off to the attendant, who, I noticed, carefully held it with both hands as I walked through the me_al detector. A quick trip as I'd eaten lunch in Solon rather than trying to smuggle it into the park. I retrieved my camera and started my tour.
First up was the 1925 Big Dipper. I rode in the last car. Later I rode up front. I don't like how they extended the seat backs, but I do like how the undivided seats are surrounded by about 4" of soft padding on all sides...including the knee pad in front of the seat. And of course, I like the lap bar.
<blasphemy>
But quite frankly, I just don't get it. Perhaps the train needs service and
the fact that the track doesn't appear to have had any work done on it in ages
have something to do with it. Whatever the cause, I found NO airtime on the
ride at either end of the train. It's slow, it's rough, the trains track poorly,
and the far turnaround isn't even a curve...it's polygonal. In all honesty,
Miller's Screechin' Eagle at LeSourdsville Lake is a much better ride,
and even Cedar Point's Blue Streak, in spite of its crappy train, is
better than this. Oh, sure, I remember getting better rides than this out of
Big Dipper, and I don't see any evidence of how the park might have screwed
it up. So I don't know what is wrong. But I do know that on this trip I found
Big Dipper to be really dull.
</blasphemy>
I started around the park. Mind Eraser was my next stop, the first time a Premier park used that name on a ride that wasn't a Vekoma SLC. Well, it IS a Vekoma, anyway. I noticed that Geauga Lake now has the LoQ system in place for FastLane, and I had to laugh when I saw it on the Mind Eraser: the FastLane entrance and its machine is at the base of the ramp leading from the (presently empty and bypassed) queue maze up to the station. No separate entrance or anything. That suggests to me that the Mind Eraser perhaps seldom gets a long line. I asked the attendant as I stepped onto the platform and into the train, but I'm not sure he understood the nature of the question, and I didn't wait around to discuss it. I boarded the train, and we were off.
As Boomerangs go, Geauga's is in par with the one at Darien Lake, but scores a bonus for having a more comfortable train. Most Boomerangs are pretty awful, but this one is actually decent. If you've written off Boomerangs as about as not much fun, you might give this one a try. I, on the other hand, having just ridden it, made my way to Superman Ultimate Escape. I said Geauga's Boomerang is decent; there is no need to over-do it!
Superman Ultimate Escape is the earliest Impulse coaster in the US, and the only one that seems to not have had any problems with the holding brake on the back spike. Well, that's not entirely true. There have been absolutely no problems with the holding brake on the back spike of Cedar Point's Wicked Twister, but that doesn't count because it doesn't have a holding brake. Anyway, I walked around to the boarding platform and prepared to take my seat in the third row of the train. As I boarded I noted, as I had a week ago on Wicked Twister, that a hand-grip attached overhead to the car chassis would make it a lot easier to get into and out of the seat. I took my seat and pulled down the shoulder bar. I noticed immediately that Superman is very different from Wicked Twister in an important way. On Wicked Twister, when I pull the shoulder bar down, it is tight against my shoulders and it's really tough to get the safety belt to latch. On Superman, there was a good two inches of clearance between my shoulder and the underside of the shoulder bar. And yet, I still had trouble getting the safety belt to latch. My conclusion is that short, fat people can ride Wicked Twister, while tall, skinny people can ride Superman Ultimate Escape. I can ride either one, but they both require a bit of effort. When Superman took off, it felt like it "stuttered" a bit on the way out of the station, but it got well up the front spike on the first shot. I noticed that the train bumps and shakes quite a lot...basically it just runs rough...compared to Wicked Twister. But the holding brake on the back spike is a real hoot. I still don't know which one I like better. Fortunately it doesn't matter! I noticed that when Superman parks in the station, it seems to shuffle back and forth a lot, while Wicked Twister just pulls into the parking position and stops. I also noticed that there is a lot of hot air blowing off the station LIMs on Superman, a lot more than I ever noticed on Wicked Twister. My conclusion is that Wicked Twister is, not unexpectedly (since it's a couple of years newer), a technologically more refined ride.
The observation tower was scheduled down all day, but the El Dorado, the old Mirage, was not. It ws down, but three guys in blue shirts were crawling over the tub and (presumably) cussing at the ride. Not really a big surprise, actually. I had a nice chat with the operations guy left behind to tell people, "Sorry, ride's closed!". Then I went off to ride rides that were running. I didn't ride the Ferris wheel, but I noticed that other people were, even though the sign at the gate said it would be closed all day. I went on around to what used to be the other side of the park.
I was proceeding in a more-or-less systematic fashion, which brought me to Serial Thriller, the park's Vekoma Suspended Looping Coaster. Geauga Lake got this one some years after most of the Premier Parks got them, and by the time they installed it, the name "Mind Eraser" had already been taken by the park's Boomerang. So this one became known as Serial Thriller. Aside from its location in the middle of a swamp, I don't know all the things that are different about this ride, except that back when it was new, it gave a ride that was almost but not quite entirely unlike the ride given by any other suspended looping coaster. It was smooth, it was fast, it even had a bit of a roar to it. Unfortunately the ride has not aged well, and the crew has deteriorated markedly over the years. When the ride was new, the Geauga Lake crews were loading and checking the train so fast that this was the only SLC that could actually see a benefit to operating three trains. Now, it seems those days are gone. I don't know why it takes so long for them to load a train, but unfortunately, it does. The ride itself is more fitful than it once was, rattling and shaking where it didn't used to, and thwacking heads where it never did before. It's still decent at least, but by no means great anymore. Such a pity. Rather than dwell on it, I went back to ride Double Loop.
Double Loop has two vertical loops. And almost nothing else. I say almost nothing else, because as you hike the queue and climb the stairs you can get a pretty good view into the now-closed picnic grove with its now-disused picnic shelterhouse. Inside this shelterhouse is a dozen PTC roller coaster cars, most of which appear to be missing their front axles. They aren't, of course; that's just those old trailered cars from the Raging Wolf Bobs. Anyway, Double Loop hasn't changed a lot. Oh, I did notice an odd device attached to the back of the last car. It's a little black box with an LED numeric display, I presume some kind of counter. I didn't get a good enough look to see whether it was counting hours or cycles. Interesting idea either way, though.
Next to Double Loop, of course, is the assay office of G. A. Lococo, from which, at regular intervals, one of two Gerstlauer trains departs and rides over the wood-capped galvanized steel structure whose construction necessitated the above-referenced closure of the aforementioned picnic facility. Meaning, of course, the Villain. It's a CCI wood coaster, which means it takes off, and from the moment it drops off the lift chain, it doesn't slow down. That's what CCI coasters do. There's air down the first drop, over the second hill...in the middle of the ride there is a long flat section right after a front-end turnaround where there would be a block brake if the park ever wanted to run three trains. Of course, there is no storage track, the transfer table can only hold one train, and Villain's third train is now on another coaster, so that probably won't ever happen. But after this non-brake, there is a sudden deep drop which sets the ride up for a lively return run. It zips around the course and finally grinds to a halt on the safety brake with the wheels still spinning. I noted in Rastus' trip report from a week or so ago that he found the bottoms of the first two drops to be intolerably rough. I thought both were okay, but one drop...memory fails...the first drop? has at the bottom a straight section of CCI "trick track". It isn't all that rough, but it slams one way, then the other, and the train is running so fast there that instead of feeling like a gimmick it feels more like a mistake. That, and the lack of padding on the trains are what spoil an otherwise outstanding ride. But that is to be expected. Did CCI ever build a bad coaster? Aside from Big Chief's Pegasus, I mean...!
Across the midway, but well hidden behind the trees is Geauga Lake's Mangels-Illions carousel. Of all the carousels in Ohio, this one deserves special recognition for several reasons. First, it's got Illions carvings on it, which is a rarity to begin with. Second, it has the Mangels mechanism, which allows the horses to slide outward as the ride picks up speed...and this mechanism is fully functional. Third, I clocked this enormous machine at about 6.5 RPM for most of its very long ride cycle. That makes it a pretty exciting ride right there! Fourth, it has really long crank arms, meaning the horses REALLY go up and down. And finally, its band organ, well hidden behind the large carved wooden scenery panel, is really awesome. It's big and loud, and it's in perfect tune. It doesn't have any bells on it, but I suspect it may have an extra rank of pipes in it or something, as this thing goes well beyond the usual melody and counter-melody, playing graceful counter-counter-melodies. At one point this thing was playing the "Stars and Stripes March" and having no trouble at all with the melody, the harmony, and the piccolo part. Not so long ago the organ on this ride was silenced; now it's back in a big way and it sounds great. That means we have a decent sounding band organ at Kings Island and a phenomenal sounding band organ at Geauga Lake...when will we hear a response from the two long-disused (but allegedly fully functional) organs at Cedar Point?
I couldn't pass up a ride on the Road Runner Express. I do think the horn that sounds at the beginning of the ride and as the 20-car train rumbles through the station after its first pass is wrong, though. The horn goes "HaaaaaaaaaaaNK!" when it really ought to just go "beep beep!". 8-) The ride is kind of strange because the train is so incredibly long, so it has its highest speeds and lowest speeds in unexpected spots when you ride it in the back, as I did. The ride is an extra-long version of the Zierer "Tivoli" or "Marienkäfer" coaster, and while it lacks any significant drops, unlike so many modern junior coasters, it's actually interesting.
Across the midway, sharing a swamp with Serial Thriller, is Batman Knight Flight, a B&M "floorless" coaster. I still think the whole floorless thing is a useless gimmick. Batman is better paced than some of the B&M rides, but it's still not particularly interesting, and it's got a nasty headbang on a section of straight track. I still say that if B&M wanted a gimmick for these coasters they should have spared us the floorless nonsense and used their SpeedCoaster train instead.
I trudged on up the hill. I noticed that Bob the Raging Wolf is still not reclining on his rock. I also noticed that, as promised, the trashy PTC trailered train wasn't running on the ride, either. Instead, Villain's mysterious third train was doing duty on Raging Wolf Bobs. That means Raging Wolf Bobs only has one train now rather than the two it used to have (but never operated). You know, it's a different body style, and the purple might clash with the red and white of Raging Wolf Bobs, but I know where Six Flags could get a complete Gerstlauer train in decent shape, only used a couple of seasons. That could work as a second train for Wolf Bobs...
Anyway, I am not entirely pleased with the switch to the Gerstlauer train. The loss of padding is lamentable, the loss of yet another coaster with drop-down lap bars is another tragedy. But I am also not entirely displeased, as the Gerstlauer train, though it still can't go around curves, tracks much more sensibly than the PTC trailered cars this ride used to run. I always wanted to get together with park maintenance and a qualified engineer and perform radical surgery to fix the PTC trains. Oh, well... The performance change with the Gerstlauer train is evident as the train tracks the very first curve from the station to the lift. Then we head down the first drop and around the first layer of the three-level helix. At the bottom of the hill, the train starts bouncing and shuffling. A decade of abuse under the wheels of a train that not only couldn't navigate curves, but that actively rejected them, combined with years of apparent neglect have done serious damage to the track on this ride. It's still a really rough ride, probably made worse by the unpadded trains. I sat in the front seat, and let me tell you, it's not a pretty sight. Coming out of the helix is the S-curve where the train comes out and goes to the right to make its pass through the ride's second prong. After bouncing through the front-end turnaround on that prong, the tran passes through the helix a second time. This time, a miraculous transformation occurs. Just before the train starts around the helix the second time, suddenly the track steel gets wider, the buckling and splitting in the wood disappears, and the red stain appears fresh. Right on cue, the train straightens out (which is an odd thing for it to do as it goes through a curve) and the whole character of the ride changes. Suddenly it isn't a rough ride anymore! And it's faster! It picks up speed instead of scrubbing it off! It practically flies through the helix, around the ride's high-speed third prong, around the helix again, and back down the brake run. It's a night and day difference between the old track in the first half of the ride and the new track in the end of the ride. I miss the old seats, but Six Flags was smart enough to realize that if they continued to run the old train it would just tear up their wonderful new track. So they did the right thing in switching trains even though I'm not a huge Gerstlauer fan. When they get the retracking done in a year or two, this could turn into a pretty good ride!
At this point, I started down the long asphalt path that runs behind Raging Wolf Bobs. There is a long space there that is too close to Geauga Lake Road to put anything on the shore side, and Raging Wolf Bobs takes up all the space on the lake side. They did add a couple of vending carts where I bought an expensive Sno Cone ($4!!!) to consume on my way over to Shouka's Happy Harbor. Okay, so they just call it Happy Harbor. And on the climbing structure, the big crawl-through submarine still has another whale's name painted on it. Over here, I failed to ride the Scrambler, Spider, Sea Dragon, Yo-Yo, and Pirate's Flight. I planned to come back to those, but never made it. I confess I took a quick climb up the big net, damaging a thumbnail in the process and wishing I had my Leatherman™ handy to perform the necessary amputation. Instead I had to race up to the back gate First Aid station and get them to dig up a nail clipper. That, in fact, was why I missed all those rides. With my thumb repaired, I proceeded through the lush landscape and lousy sight-lines of this side of the park. I wandered, and finally came to the Thriller Bees, the Huss Bee-Bee moved up here from Kentucky Kingdom. Kennywood's Swing Around is bigger and better, and this thing puts Worlds of Fun's Fijord Fairlane to shame. As I boarded, I noticed an interesting modification. I pulled down on the lap bar, but it only came down half-way, keeping the end of the bar well away from the potentially-hazardous latch pocket until the operator came around and pulled a lever on the back of the tub. Interesting. Nothing changed for unloading, just for loading. A simple change, it will probably let some kid keep his fingers into adulthood.
Next to the Thriller Bees is the Starfish, a Chance Wipeout with a dubious history. This one has retracting individual seat belts, lots of warning stickers, and a new panel next to the door that I still don't understand, all in response to that dubious history. As for the ride, it is the only Wipeout I have ridden that runs full cycle. I could do without the last bit of the cycle, though, when the turret stops and the rim spins at what feels like a break-neck speed.
All day long, the park was not particularly crowded, and I was treated to short waits for the rides. I came around a corner and saw where everybody was. There is a huge ampitheater at this corner of the park, where hundreds of people were getting splashed by an enormous black and white marine mammal named Shouka. The place was packed full, and Shouka was clearly putting on a crowd-pleasing show. I was equally impressed by the video technology. Nothing particulaly exotic, just a couple of hand-held wireless cameras, a couple of robotic camera heads, and a Jumbotron-type display up on stage. Hey, I'm a video geek, what do you expect? Anyway, I hiked up to the top of the shed and watched the tail end of the show.
After the show, I hiked across the floating bridge, now positioned parallel to the ferry route across Geauga Lake, thus completing the loop around the park. At the other end I left the lush, confusing, twisted theme park paths and re-entered the more comfortable, more familiar world of the traditional amusement park. I took a wander through the water park, expanded again this year with a bunch of new slides, and came out near the Big Dipper. A bit of video later and I had approached the end of my tape. I exited the park, receiving a squiggly line stamped on my hand as I left. I dropped off the camera in the car, knowing that for the other ride I wanted to ride, the crew would probably complain about it...although in fairness, nobody gave me any argument or complaint all day long. I figured I would avoid any possible trouble. When I re-entered the park, I went straight to X-Flight. There, a long line led to the right platform, and a short one went to the left. So I went to the left and proceeded directly to the back row. A loaded train sat in the station ahead of me. Also directly in front of me was a guy in a blue shirt with a wrench in his hand. Something was clearly wrong, and this guy was crawling under the train. Eventually he came up with a couple of fuse holders, swapped out the fuses, got clear of the train, and the seats reclined. He wasn't satisfied, though, and he crawled underneath again. After a bit of tinkering, he gave a signal and the seats went up again, all but the ones in the back row. Finally, he connected a box to the side of the train to manually release the lap bars and shoulder harnesses, and helped the two riders in the back seat to crawl out of their still-reclined seats. Then he let everybody out of the rest of the train. Meanwhile in the other station, things were running smoothly. I was thinking it more interesting to watch the mechanics do their thing, but finally the staff shut down the station and made us all go around to the other station. A few minutes later, I was wriggling into the back seat of the other train. With a word, the seats reclined, and we cruised head-first out of the station and up the hill. You know, these trains have all kinds of hydraulic and electrical equipment on board because the seats were originally supposed to recline while the train was on the lift hill. But it doesn't operate like that, so all that extra equipment could have been left off, replaced by a cam follower and a single hydraulic system in each station. The ride concept is interesting enough, but the train is just way, way, way too complicated, with (I think) seven PLCs on board each train. Anyway, at least one of the high-tech features of the X-Flight train, the electromechanical anti-rollback silencer, has apparently been abandoned, as both tranis were clicking their way up the lift hill all day long.
The ride begins with a climb to the top of the lift, then at the top the train flips over and stays in the face-down position for basically the whole ride except for the big vertical loop, which is taken on your back, and which gives you a chance to wave at the riders in the other end of the train. That's kind of neat. But while it is a neat ride, it isn't particularly pleasant, and the novelty of dangling in the shoulder harness gets pretty old by the end of the ride. It's a neat ride, but I doubt I'll ever call it a favorite.
I had some time left, and I opted to spend it riding the best coaster in the park, The Villain. With both trains running and practically no crowd, conditions were great for me to get a half-dozen rides within a half-hour or so. What I noticed is that while Villain's back seat gets all the attention, I think I actually got slightly more good airtime up front, not to mention slightly shorter waits on the platform. The more I ride this thing, the more I enjoy it. If only it didn't suffer the same problem as every other adult-size wood coaster in the State of Ohio: crummy trains.
I'd had a full day, and I'd mostly enjoyed myself. Yes, folks, it is possible to have a good time at Geauga Lake, in spite of the horror stories that have circulated in the past few years. Perhaps I am just lucky, always picking the best days to visit...Anyway, I've never actually had a bad day there, and this visit was no exception.
--Dave
Althoff, Jr.
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